photos by OK Connett Dec 2010 -Brenda/Panhandle

ITS DECEMBER IN UTAH,

SALT LAKE CITY UTAH

A week ago it was only 18 degrees !

Remember taking out the garbage?

Walking to your... Car, twenty feet away?

So cold, you started your car to warm it up !

AND RAN BACK INTO THE HOUSE...

WHERE IT WAS WARM !

The are people outside in that COLD !

They can't run back into the house...

THEY DONT HAVE ONE...

They are HOMELESS !

Can you imagine sitting on a Cold, Cold sidewalk?

To beg for money? To Panhandle ?

On November 16th the City Council was ready to vote on Anti Panhandling Laws !

Luckily, citizens spoke against the law as written.

The vote is postponed until after the first of 2011

Wrap your Brain Around that...

Homeless...

...No Money

Panhandling...

...Against the Law ?

...Can ...You... Say... ...Absurd?

Let me Introduce Brenda

Brenda is homeless and pregnant

Brenda's sign LITERALLY says;

Homeles

Pregnet

Trying to geta warm and dry plac to stay

Thanks and god bless you

What else does her sign say?

That she is not well educated.

That being COLD AND WET SUCKS!

Warm and Dry is the most important thing!

Notice food isn't mentioned?

After speaking to Brenda for a few minutes I had a better understanding of Brenda and of the homeless.

Brenda has been homeless for the last 4 or 5 months.

She says she has been homeless off and on for the last 2 or 3 years.

When asked why she is homeless she states the economy.

Previously she has worked in fast food and with the carnival.

Her family can't help, they have no room.

I asked if she frequented or couldn't go to the shelters?

she said rather emphatically,

"I don't do shelters anymore"

I politely inquired why since she was so adamant?

After only a slight hesitation she said,

"I have been clean the last 2-3 years, even though I have been homeless"

"When I first became homeless, I went to the shelter"

"That is where I got into drugs"

"I will never go back to the shelters, too many chances for drugs"

"I am clean and I want to stay that way"

I asked how people treated her since she was homeless.

She said,

"Most are nice and try to help"

"Other act like you don't exist"

Before I left I asked if she had any advice for others?

Again she stated with some passion;

"It can happen to anyone"

"Drugs will do it to you quick"

and "Watch out if you go to the shelters, it's easy to get into drugs"

I wished Brenda the best for the holidays and asked if she was going to be okay. She nodded and looked a little ashamed. I thanked her for sharing and gave her the six dollars I had in my wallet. I hoped she would be okay as I left.

I couldn't imagine being Brenda. Forty-seven years old, female, pregnant and homeless.

As I drove home in my 2002 ford ranger, I examined how fortunate I am.

I continue to be convinced that education is still one of our nations best investments for many of our country's problems and many of our less fortunate people.

Love is in the Air... then in a blink... Love is gone along with everything else !

Bishop William K. Weigand

Resource Center

Salt Lake City, Utah

*Who is Bishop Weigand?

The Resource Center is,

used for showers, hygiene and

short term limited storage

of personal items.

Brandon Roberts at The Road Home Facility

Photo by OK Connett Dec 2010.

Brandon Proposes to his finance', she says yes and the celebration becomes a nightmare.

Brandon's new fiancé Katrina and her sisters’ are at their apartment in celebration of their engagement on Valentines Day 2009. At 35, a firefighter, with 3 great boys and a woman he loves, Brandon thinks to himself...It doesn’t get any better than this.

Then... “SMASH”!

He see stars, then only darkness, until he wakes up.

Can you imagine waking up in jail?

Picture it for a moment...

• You wake up to concrete, bars and fluorescent lights.
• Deafening noise, yelling, fighting, and the clang of barred doors slamming.
• A gross smell burning your nostrils!
• Vomit?
• Urine?
• Dirty sweat?
• OMG, all of them... it’s horrendous.

Now you think... YOU... are going to puke!

Then you notice something more concerning than being in jail.

ü A very large, un-kept man in the corner.

ü He is staring at you and grinning maniacally.

ü Yes, it has gotten a lot worse, actually it is hellish!

His sister in-laws jealousy cost Brandon his freedom, his kids, his world !

Meet Brandon Roberts, originally from Salt Lake City, Utah. Ten months ago returning from his home in New Mexico and the nightmare described above.

After the fact he finds out his fiancés sisters were jealous, got drunk and cold-cocked him, charging him with assault.

Brandon went to jail losing everything.

Ø His job – Wild-land firefighter

Ø His home

Ø His fiance’

Ø His kids – His 3 boys

Ø His normal life, security, possessions and peace

But at least he is free and without a conviction for assault.

Eventually the charges were dropped but not until everything was lost and he was homeless. Thankfully, Katrina his ex-fiancé signed statements regarding the falsity of her sisters and their motivations. Unfortunately, while he was in jail Katrina discovered a new love.

Brandon moves back to Utah

He hopes his family can help, but they have issues that could make things worse. So he picks up a small job once in awhile and frequents the shelter.

Shelter Directory of Utah

As a Homeless man he finds shelter in Utah’s, The Road Home *(Directions)

The Road home shelter provides many things,

• A place to sleep out of the cold
• A place to get hot meals to eat
• A place to clean up and shower
• Limited storage for some things, is available

Even within “The Road Home” there are rules but things get “wild”.

He has been in a fight, defending another man over a bunk bed.

The Social Norms are blurred, things like,

o Respect

o Courtesy

o Personal space

o Culture

o Many of these are distorted and often totally disregarded.

Brandon finds life at the shelter edgy and frustrating, never knowing what might be perceived as an insult or territorial violation. Brandon says it’s like living on the edge of a cliff, each day a new challenge.

Sadly he says many can’t help it, as they are mentally ill.

Brandon’s Advice for those who believe they are immune from homelessness,

“You don’t always get what you want”,

“I guess change can be good, but its up to you.”

Even in a Shelter, you are not sheltered from "The Streets"

Photo by OK Connett 2010 - Homeless man

My next interview was with a 39 year old male who will turn 40 in December.

We will call him “Loco” to protect his identity. I let him choose his alias.

I could see why shortly after our interview began, Suddenly...

• A Street Thug burst into our interview conversation.
• He grabbed Loco by the throat.
• Slammed him against my vehicle.
• Swearing and threatening Loco.
• Turning on me, When I said "Hey, What are you doing?"

He was accusing Loco of calling him a name the previous day.

After numerous attempts to deny and explain that he did not say or do anything to this street thug, Loco was smacked in the face and threatened with bodily harm if further verbal slurs with directed upon the perpetrator.

Such is life on the streets, where power and aggression are just a blink away. ...Often whether justified or not in many cases.

Standing outside The Road Home shelter, I had just began speaking to the homeless man. I asked Loco if he knew anyone staying there, to which he replied he was. He explained to me part of the structuring of the “Road Home” and its available to men, women and families.

He stated he has only been there 2 weeks, though admits he has been homeless (off and on) most of his life. He shifts his feet and averts his gaze uncomfortably stating he really has no family or relative to turn to.

Not stereotypical.

Loco is polite, courteous and apologizes for frequent expletives. He has become part of the street. The rough lingo replete with profanity IS REQUIRED to establish "identity" on the streets. (It reminded me of the book Lord of the Flies)

He is only about 5’8”, maybe 145 lbs., the salt and pepper hair on his head and face creating a contrast between his perceived age of 50 rather than his actual 39 years.

Thrilled to work in a warehouse for $12/hour when he can get it.

The last job he had was warehouse job. Loco said it was a good job, it paid $12/hr., and lasted almost a year. When asked what happened to the job he lowers his head and states that it was a lay-off, so probably the economy. When asked if any other factors contributed, he stated that “Seniority” was also a factor, those who had been there over 2 years still had their jobs.

Proud to have beaten his addiction

Prior to this bout of homelessness, Loco states he moved to Salt Lake from Florida three years ago. In Florida he worked at a Wendy’s for 6 months and after losing that job he decided to attempt a new start in Utah. I questioned, what he meant by that?

Loco stated ;

"I have struggled with cocaine addiction".

He is quick to perk up, stand a bit straighter and pronounce that he is doing better and has 13 months “clean”. He states it was creating problems, including a brief encounter with the legal system. He proudly states he cleaned up on his own, no treatment program or anything, so I congratulated him.

He was visibly moved by my praise.

Homelessness has many stressors, mainly "Survival " !

As we discussed homelessness and what is the toughest part, he says it is the “Stress” and “Survival”. Though he admits there is the “shame” factor because people look down on you and fear you.

“It is totally foreign so it creates fear of the unknown”, he says.

He then goes on to explain that there are dangerous homeless people for sure, but usually most homeless people are very giving and very kind.

When asked if he had any advice on the best way to keep from becoming homeless?

He said:

“Definitely, don’t do drugs”!

He then paused, seemed to reflect and looked at me and said;

“It is really surprising how at any time, a situation can change and before you realize its happening, you are on your way to homelessness, swept up in a powerful river of circumstances you didn’t anticipate”.

I thanked him for his time, shook his hand and wished him luck. He started to turn away, instead asking me what time it was? I replied 7pm, which caused him to wince. Without conscious thought he mumbled,

“shit, missed meal time”

and without hesitation he said,

“Hey, you got any money, can you spare a couple bucks, I missed dinner?”

As I handed him some cash, in my mind I heard

“Welcome to the streets, and Homelessness, "

From a Home to a car, then Garage, Homelessness SUCKS !

Photos by OK Connett 2010 -

Garage in utah valley, temp shelter.

The STRUGGLE of everyday people, who have lost what we take for granted, EVERYDAY!

In the end...

Its out of the weather...

But a garage...

Is a long way to fall...

Without a Parachute

What do you take for granted everyday?

Usually the simplest things are missed the most.

• Bath or shower
• Laundry facilities
• My refrigerator
• A comfortable chair or couch
• Warmth in winter
• Cool in summer
• Security & Safety

BEFORE.......

Average successful family man, great job, comfort, recreation vehicles.

AFTER....

N O T H I N G... NOT EVEN EACH OTHER !

Not so different, as many americans are a paycheck or two away from homelessness

(USA Today - Money; Homelessness grows as more live check-to-check)

Mr. and Mrs. Jay, a married couple of 23 years in their 40’s were willing to share enough facts to illuminate their plight.

Mr. Jay was successful in “Big boy Toys” for over 20 years, averaged $60K/yr and had what most of us have; a home, family, toys and hobbies. He particularly enjoyed playing golf or racing. Mrs. Jay was a typical homemaker with Mary Kay and Avon skills.

Can you control when you get sick?

The "Cost" can be HIGH, Very High !

In 2002 the major health issues of Mrs. Jay, strained their finances. Like domino's one by one the threads began to unravel their lives.

Has the economy touched your life? It touched the Jays.

1. The economy dipped
2. They made a mistake or two
3. The layoff
4. A solid company goes under unexpectedly
5. The loss of their home
6. The tumbling becomes an avalanche.

You may think... Not me, I have family?

Wouldn't most families help? Maybe your family is struggling too?

In-laws let them move in temporarily, but when work doesn’t come, people find “not everyone can't live together as adults”.

Parents clash with adult children due to their lifestyles being thrust together. The parents to accuse and judge, not understanding their adult children's ways of doing things.

While the adult son-in-law struggles with emotions, inflamed by rejection in the job market. These frustrations slowly culminate in self doubt and defeat. In crisis the family can fall apart, fight and be fragmented.

Struggles for Control during a crises divide and wreck the family bond.

As Mrs. Jay's health worsenes, the in-laws want to take control of her medication. This creates new power struggles between a married couple not used to having others involved in their routine.

Stress... failure... !

Escape is desirable !

Alcohol is frequently that escape!

Depression, a DUI, and the car is gone, impounded. Plink goes a domino

Now the courts place additional obstacles including financial obligations when there isn’t enough money for everyday expenses. Plink goes another domino

HOMELESSNESS ARRIVES QUICKLY AND WITHOUT WARNING !

Mrs. Jay's health suffers more set-backs due to stress and the aged mother becomes domineering, creating animosity within the immediately family. The stresses are affecting all the dynamics and things are getting tense.

The in-laws throw him out!

Mr. Jay, now homeless, spends his first night curled up in a ball on the porch of a hair salon in a fitful sleep.

Sadly a casual friend, out of work for over a year himself tries to help.

• Offered a sleeping bag
• Offers a car that doesn’t run to sleep in
• Loans a bicycle for transportation
• Lets him use his facilities and laundry
• When it got cold upgrading him to a corner of his garage

Homelessness makes it twice as hard to find a job, be presentable for interviews and not give up.

Mr. Jay looks for work, finds a small job (now and then) but usually just enough to cover the tools he has pawned or the few things he has in a small storage unit. He goes to court soon for the DUI, but has been going to AA and saving to pay the $100 required assessment for the courts.

Mr. Jay reflects on getting interviews, feeling hope and then rejection.

In the End...

Mr. Jay says;

“Its like a roller coaster from hell where everything may work out just around the next violent turn or the tracks could be tore out and I plunges to my death”!

When you see Homelessness do you ignore it, pity it, attempt to help or pretend it doesn't exist?

Photo by OK Connett 2010 copyrighted

This is my attempt to share what I see in Salt Lake City, Utah regarding the homeless during these economic times. Especially during the Winter of 2010

Non-homeless people I have questioned about the homeless think ...

• "Homeless are just lazy"
• "It's because they are addicts"
• "Most are criminals and live like animals, its all they know"

This may be true, but often it is not.

I have found many are just like you and me.

I have realized in the last 2 years how dangerously close I have come to being homeless.

I CAN'T ignore them.

I pity them and I realize many are very similar to me, my friends, or my neighbors.

Anyone can have events that change the path and direction of their lives in the blink of an eye.

This blog is my attempt to pull back the veil and a reveal their stories, at least for a brief moment in time.

I hope it will open other peoples eyes, help them sympathize and empathize for their fellow man and woman... or homeless families.

In the end they are all human beings struggling to survive for various reasons;

• Addicts
• Mentally Ill
• Special or disabled
• Displaced due to lifestyle choices
• A product of the economy
• Simply unfortunate, unlucky or victim of circumstances
• WHAT IF IT WAS YOU?

THESE ARE... the stories of 4 individuals and how they became homeless.

I will introduce two of the shelters that attempt to offers some refuge, The Road Home and the Rescue Mission of Salt Lake City, Utah. I have also included the Shelter Directory for Utah .

Some of it may shock you as it did me. I never took the time to truly consider all the aspects of homelessness.

I will include information about the homeless that may be useful or interesting, as I look into the lives of individuals less fortunate.

I have attempted to include video links, articles and even actions by the city council in regards to panhandling ordinances that could criminalize the act.

A few photos to help you step outside yourself and feel the chill of sitting and begging for coins or food on a frozen sidewalk.

Similarly, the portrait of a human beings whose entire existence... is in a backpack or in their pockets.

I invite you to explore the possibilities and suspend judgment.

Even if only for a few moments, in the comfort of your "space".

These people have a seriously different definition;

.........of their "SPACE"!

........ and of "COMFORT"

I personally,

OK Connett thank you for your interest and time in your fellow man, woman and community. I hope my efforts are enlightening and thought provoking.